Chapter 13- Reconnected

Shivanesh was already a year through his Diploma and in his second year of studies. His routine was the same every day. But he often has fun during his class time. He had friends who are really great people. His closest buddy was Eric. Well many actually labelled them as ‘gay partners’ due to the closeness of their friendship. Shivanesh was already in his second year of studies.

He has a great deal of friends which kept on making his life a fun adventure. These friends became a part of his life when they all sat in a class for Sociology lessons. There are 2 seniors, Sanjay and Herald. Friends from probably another planet like the crazy Raakesh, silent but funny Varun, strict but loyal Reshman, silent but prankster Sahadev, and the innocent grant, Yogendran. Not to forget Raakesh’s girlfriend who is bubbly and cheerful, Mrithubashini. They became really close to each other after a field trip they had in Cameron Highlands. They were all sitting together for a drink. They were all enjoying tea together instead of having any alcohol drinks like how a bunch of college students would do. But the truth was actually, the selection of tea being their companion drink was just because they all ran out of beer.

They were sharing a lot of stories and having funny conversations for hours. That is when they realized that they are all somehow connected to each other. And now, they call themselves the IUCs. They know that they can rely on each other no matter what happens. Not to mention, there were 3 lecturers that eventually became a part of the gang as well as their age gap is not so far apart. There was a young, bubbly and strict Mr. Shashimohan and the dearest couple, Mr. Rupesh and Miss Divyashini.

Shivanesh always enjoyed his time in college. There were still a part of him that sometimes feel a bit of pain as he has not fully cured from Amrita and when that happens, he does seek for comfort on the cheap liquor and cigarettes. Shivanesh does know his limits with alcohol. However, he still cannot bring himself to stop smoking. But he is very glad he made the decision of continuing his studies because now he has amazing friends who helps him to feel better. Besides, he has his mother and sister who always support him. Shivanesh was fully driven to make an achievement for himself.

Shivanesh recently found another interest where he finds comfort from. He loves making music thought he does not really has much exposure to it. He downloaded an application on his laptop, suggested by Herald and they started working on making remixs and writing lyrics. Shivanesh lets go of his concerns and heartaches through his lyrics and music. Though he never really let anyone listen to it. He still tends to find comfort in it.

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Amrita is now is her second half of her Form 6. She met many friends. But her focus has always been for her studies. She was really focused on her studies. She paid most attention in her classes and manage to create a bond with her teachers which never was a problem to her in the first place. She often visited them to clear any doubts she has regarding her subjects. Amrita is really serious in making her dreams come true.

Amrita took some extra tuition to improve on her understanding in each subject. So far, she found herself doing quite well. Her parents are very supportive about what she was going to do. Only thing she was missing was a friend to share everything that she is going through. As much as she is close to her family, but there were some things that she felt more secured and comfortable talking it out to a friend. She does miss the one true friend she had who really cared and understood her well. She felt like she has ignored him for too long, but she is afraid to try to contact him first.

Amrita was working on a lab report when she suddenly heard a beep on her laptop. She checked her laptop and saw an incoming message from someone she least expected.

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Shivanesh was checking through his Facebook timeline when he decided to do something crazy and  send a message to someone. When he was looking through his chat list, he realized a name that he has not been able to speak to for a very long time. He does miss her a lot. No matter how much he tries to ignore and forget the feelings he have for her, it just makes his feelings get deeper. He was afraid to send her a message cause he was afraid to be ignored again. He was debating with himself on whether or not he should text her and what should he send to her. After 15 minutes staring at an empty chatroom window, he sent her a message.

#

Amrita saw the message and felt a slight tingling in her stomach seeing the message coming in at the time she was missing him most. It was as though he could sense her missing him, as ridiculous as it may sound.

Shivanesh:

Hi. Amrita

There were no second thoughts or any doubts when Amrita was replying to Shivanesh. She replied in an instance.

Amrita:

Hi Shivanesh, How are you?

Shivanesh:

I am fine. How are you doing? What are you doing now?

Amrita:

Well, I am actually doing my STPM. And you? What are you doing now?

Shivanesh:

I am doing my Diploma now. How is life?

The conversation was full of them catching up on each other. They didn’t just stop that night. They spoke to each other whenever they could. Eventually, Facebook Messenger Inbox is a must check inbox for both Amrita and Shivanesh whenever they turned on their laptop. It was casual chats. Him telling her about his friends and his experience while doing his Diploma and her sharing about the hardship and stress she goes through with her studies. Slowly, the conversations became as casual and personal as asking each other what they ate for the day and how was their day. After about 4 months through the casual chats, Amrita finally mustered some courage to actually ask Shivanesh about the time he was not able to be contacted. About the time he was missing.

Amrita:

Shiva. What happened to you? I tried contacting you but I could not get through

Shivanesh was thinking whether or not he should tell her the truth. He opted not to because he did not want her to ask too many questions.

Shivanesh:

I just lost my phone and changed my number. Why? Anything?

Amrita:

Really? But why didn’t you tell me? I was really missing you and needed a friend so much

Shivanesh:

Well, you were ignoring me for some time. You ignored my calls and did not reply to my text. So I assumed that who were not interested to talk to me already

Shivanesh tried his best to hide the fact of how devastated he was when she ignored him.

Amrita:

Oh. I guess I should be blamed. So sorry Shiva. I was just so confused. Anyway. Let’s put everything aside. We are back together now

Amrita replied without checking twice on the words she chose.

Shivanesh could feel his heart skip a beat when he read the message. He knew very well she meant it differently and Amrita can be clumsy with her words at times and this was one of her clumsy moment. Shivanesh decided to use it against her and tease her more.

Shivanesh:

Back together? Were we in relationship in the first place?

Seeing Shivanesh’s reply, Amrita read back the message she sent and realised that her clumsiness just chose the wrong time to show itself. “Goodness, Amrita. Why now? He is going to think that you are weird. What am I going to reply now?” Amrita thought to herself. She knows she should not wait too long reply as that will give Shivanesh the wrong idea.

Amrita:

No. I meant it is great that we are friends again. You know what I mean right?

Shivanesh:

Did we ever stopped being friends?

Shivanesh replied not letting Amrita go without more teasing.

Amrita:

Gosh Shiva. I know you are teasing me. You are so bad. I got to go. Got a tuition session to attend

Shivanesh:

Hahahaha. Okay. I shall continue later. Have fun. Text me later okay?

Amrita:

Okay

Amrita replied smiling to herself. “It has been a while since someone made me feel like this. Goodness. Shiva what are you doing to me?’ Amrita thought to herself while packing her things for her tuition.

#

Amrita at last managed to finally finish her exams properly. Just when she thought SPM was thought, STPM beat it. But she felt more confident about this time’s exams. She felt that she has prepared herself well before the exams. She knows clearly how important the exams are for her future.

Amrita was very thankful that she had a friend for her to share all her worries and concerns with she is glad that he is always there wherever she needs him. Due to her preparations for her exams, she reduced on the time she spoke to Shivanesh on Facebook Messenger. And Shivanesh totally understood that she needed to focus on her exam preparations and he was totally fine with it even though he missed her when they can’t talk to each other. For Amrita, it was nice to know that she has someone who knows her well that she can speak her heart out to.

Amrita also understood that Shivanesh is equally busy with his studies and she really hopes and prays he do well all the time. Both Amrita and Shivanesh eventually became a hidden support system to each other without them realizing it. They do chat but never confronted their true feelings in chat. They often shared about funny events in a day or other experience that could be an interest to the other. Amrita cannot wait to meet him again. She missed him a lot. She does see how he looks on Facebook but she is curious to know more about him. She misses the time they used to spend with each other talking about the stupidest topics. All she wish is that they could eventually come back to how they were as she could feel that Shivanesh makes her feel happy.